What If It's Not a Social Skill…It's Executive Function?
We've all had that moment: a student shares their thoughts enthusiastically during group time, processes social cues differently, or connects ideas in ways that seem unexpected. The knee-jerk instinct is to call it a "social skills issue."
But what if it's not about missing social knowledge at all? What if their brain just processes executive function differently?
The Hidden Link Most People Miss
Social communication looks like it's about language and behavior. But so much of it actually depends on internal executive function processes:
Inhibition: waiting your turn, stopping a joke mid-story if it flops
Cognitive Flexibility: adjusting your story when someone's confused or bored
Working Memory: remembering what someone just said while forming your reply
Initiation: starting a conversation without prompts
When we reframe those enthusiastic contributions or unique conversational patterns as differences in executive function processing, we don't just understand the child better. We unlock support strategies that actually match how their brain works.
Use This Tomorrow: The "Pre-Load" Strategy
Here's something you can try in your next session or group:
Before a conversation activity, pause with your student
Give their brain a specific job: "Your brain's job is to notice when someone looks confused"
Provide a waiting strategy: "If you feel excited to talk, squeeze this fidget while you wait"
Set up success before the interaction begins
This builds awareness before the skill is needed—and gives the brain something productive to do while waiting.
The Shift That Changes Everything
When you reframe "social skills problems" as "brains that process executive function differently," you move from correction to collaboration. From behavior management to brain-matched supports. From external rules to honoring internal systems.
And that's the kind of support that actually sticks.
Ready to Better Support Different Brain Types?
Download my FREE Social-Executive Function Screener to quickly identify whether you're seeing social knowledge gaps or differences in executive function processing. This 5-minute assessment will change how you see—and support—students who learn differently.
Want personalized guidance? Book a coaching call and I'll help you create brain-matched executive function supports for your specific students or clients.
Stop using approaches that don't match how these brilliant brains work. Start providing the right supports from the start.